* That the definition of “me time” is completely different than it used to be.
Gone are the days where Brock and I would just go out somewhere for a beer or actually go to a restaurant for a meal during the week. Also much harder to accomplish- making a full meal with more than 10 ingredients with sides and a dessert. Reading a book in 2 days may not happen again for a few years; more like 2 months and that’s pushing it. Going to the gym at any time of the night, meeting our friends who don’t have kids yet for a night out at the drop of a hat and actually having plenty extra funds every week for shopping trips to my fav stores are all things that have taken a backseat.
But you know what? When Brock and I are 40 and sad because our boys are living their own lives, I know I will wish more than anything to have these crazy no “me time” days every day again. Family time trumps “me time”–every time. Memories are priceless!
*That you will never have an organized house again.
I’m so type A and I dream of the day that I come home and sort out the mail into coupons/bills to pay/save and file containers and cook in my uncluttered kitchen with countertops that are free of paperwork and appliances. Afterwards I would go upstairs to a room with a bed that has been made (throw pillows and all!) and a floor clean of scattered clothes. The reality is our house is clean-but it’s normal for it to carry some load of clutter when you have kids, especially more than 1 kiddo, as I have recently learned! I’m definitely not one to throw my hands up and say “F it!” Part of me says “do the best you can” and the other part says “you will have the most organized house ever–when the boys are in college.” Ha!
I feel like you should learn to be happy with a good in-between. We are teaching Brayden to do simple things around the house. For example, he is learning to pick up his toys in the evening, and I always stress to him that it’s important to put one toy up before getting out another. He also knows to hang up his jacket, let the dogs out and put his dirty clothes in the laundry room. Baby steps, I know-but I’m so very appreciative that he likes to help his momma! He loves to help clean his play room as long as Brock or I help him and he was completely pumped about the chore chart we keep on the front of the fridge for him.
I want our boys to be helpful and mindful of why we are asking them to carry their (small) loads. I don’t want them to grow up and not know how to clean a room, do dishes or hang up clothes. But, at the same time I also realize Brayden is only 5 and he should get to be a kid, which is why we are only asking very simple things of him and try to make it fun along the way.
* That the more pets, the merrier sounds great until you start having kiddos.
Brock and I are so very guilty of this! I seriously wish we could tell our pre-kids self that 2 animals should have been our limit, or even smarter–1! We have boxers and if any of you are boxer owners then you know that these doggies never really “calm down” and they will act like a puppies until the end. I personally love this characteristic about them! However, throw some babies into the mix and things can get overwhelming fast! Until recently, we had 3 boxers and to be honest, some days were just total chaos when Brock and I were adjusting to taking care of 1 baby, then again when we had 2. I’m a firm believer in taking care of every responsibility you have and I don’t think you should ever take on an animal or a child without being able to pay for their care. $75.00 per month for heartworm preventative and $60.00 per month in food is extremely manageable until you add in an extra $50 per week in formula costs and $60 per month (approximately) for diapers. And you can’t forget all the other daily expenses like clothes, babysitting/childcare, baby gear, a major rise in health insurance costs (going from husband and wife to family plans) and several other items you have to start purchasing. Suddenly the $200 a month in pet expenses seems a little steep. Still, the pets are still there and depending on you, as their owner, to provide them with the best of environments and living the lifestyle they were used to living before kids. Some days I seriously found myself saying to Brock that I wished I had 1 five pound dog that didn’t ever shed who’s only expenses per month included a $10 bag of food, a $20 flea/heartworm pill and a grooming session every other month.
Our boxers are awesome and I wish like crazy my Stella was still with us. Our dogs love us and love our kids more than I can even explain. My point is this: if you plan to ever have kids one day, think about all the possible what if’s in your future before you bring a dog(s) into your family.
(Miss you, Stella Marie!!)
* That $100 doesn’t get you anywhere these days.
This can apply to married peeps with or without kids. No explanation required! Can I get an amen!?
*That I am capable of so much more than I ever thought.
Parenthood brings out a side of me that makes me a stronger person. I no longer come first, my family comes first. Whatever they need, whatever helps them thrive, whatever makes them smile; that’s what I want to give them. I also realize that every day I’m teaching our kids. Teaching them right from wrong, what’s good for them, how to be kind and considerate, how to have manners and even how to pray. It’s true what they say, kids are little sponges and they are listening even when you think they aren’t. I love watching Brayden and Mason learn by exploring the world around them. I love watching Brayden take Mason under his wing and protect him. It comes so natural and makes Brock and I so proud. There is a strength that comes with knowing you are behind all of these wonderful and amazing things. I never knew I was capable of teaching, mentoring, helping and guiding until I became a parent. It’s pretty freaking awesome and I’m so very happy with our boys!
*That you never know what this kind of happy is until you have it.
Five fingers, five toes, that toothless grin, first smiles, the chubby belly, the curls, the rolls and the perfect little ears.
This is happy, this is love…..